Jack was always last…

Image result for wheatfield


“There’s nothing out there,” I said stepping across decript floorboards.

They creaked in protest.

“Ok,” I responded. “I guess there’s some wheat in the field. Though it’s wilted.”

The wind shuffled the flies on the brick windowsill.

“What? You thought they were paper airplanes?” I chuckled.

It was cold. It was cold for a few nights now. I wondered where Maria was.

I looked at the tracks. The train was still. I wondered what it was waiting for.

My father’s watch was broken. I left it open where the flies had been and let the rising sun glint off the face.

It’s reflection traveling in the direction of Novgorod.

A crow cawwed in the distance.

It must have been a week since I’d gone up the stairs. I judged as much by the empty tins clustered like crown jewels in the corner.

I fiddled with the cross round my neck.


Support the Journal

Make a donation via PayPal to help zazz things up.

$1.00

Not Just Zazz…but Pizzazz

Too high class for regular Zazz? Help Pizzaz up TFJ!

$5.00

The Cottage – Chapter Thirty One – (Short Story)

Image result for kentucky goblin
                                                                                              Hellier                                                                        Part One | Part Two |Part Three |  Part Four |Part Five |  Part Six |Part Seven |Part Eight | Part Nine | Part Ten | Part Eleven | Part Twelve | Part Thirteen | Part Fourteen | Part Fifteen | Part Sixteen |Part Seventeen | Part Eighteen |Part Nineteen | Part Twenty | Part Twenty One | Part Twenty Two | Part Twenty Three | Part Twenty Four | Part Twenty Five | Part Twenty Six |Part Twenty Seven |Part Twenty Eight | Part Twenty Nine | Part Thirty

There amongst the stones he lay again. And again he had no thought. And again he found it good. But now there was no fear. There was no apprehension.

For he had reckoned the symmetries.

The propitiations had been made. The ginseng laid. The feng shui done.

He rose and strode without fear through the dark.

It was not sight that guided him.

Not sight but knowledge. Knowledge laid down from the foundation of the world. And not this paltry sphere with its pregnant groans of promise. But the world as the breath of God. The first inhilation of divine will animated his profane skeleton and reanimated that wick so long dormant with the idle cares of flesh.

A bear approached, reared on its legs, and Jim looked upon it. With a whimper it fled.

Everywhere he tred the world grew still. And the faeries followed.

The sunken lake in the heart of the mountain swallowd him whole. His drowning was the sweetest whiskey. He was drunk with the music of the spheres.

Sinking to the magenta bottom he drug the fiends along on invisibile threads of covenant.

For a sacrifice of the elder blood was a rite beyond bargaining.

There within the twinkling madness in the chasing of Ariadness thread Jim was free to dance and to bind in rhythm those maggots that would have their feast too soon.

Their will dissipated and the ghastly forms returned to stardust to lonesome fade till the appointed hour.

There he hung in a whirling vortex that would surely have shattered the earthen vessel that he had so recently abdicated.

‘Fuck.’ Jim screamed through the ether. ‘How the fuck am I going to make it back?!’ At the Jim shaped grain of dust clinging mouth agape to the cold silt.


Support the Journal

Make a donation via PayPal to help zazz things up.

$1.00

Not Just Zazz…but Pizzazz

Too high class for regular Zazz? Help Pizzaz up TFJ!

$5.00

The Duchess of York (Very Short Story)

Selling Angora Fiber from Backyard Rabbits


The hill held many things. First there was the soil, then there was the grass, and the grass and the soil was broken in places by a profusion of roots. Roots that led to trees. Beneath one such tree, an oak to be precise, sat a man not far removed from twenty.

His name was Leonard and he sighed.

“Eh.”

Behind him was the wood, ahead and all around were myriad hills, truncated only at great distance by rising mountains.

The isolation was intoxicating.

He realized that he may well be the only one to hear the wind pass through the valley save for the rabbits.

No sooner had he thought of the randy critters than it was that one appeared.

“Oy you there.”

‘Huh, he talks…’

“Don’t assume my gender lad.”

‘Fancy that he reads minds as well.’

“You’re being very rude.”

‘And you’re hare-brained.’

“Am not. I am in fact the duchess I am.”

‘Duchess of what?’

“Duchess of York.”

‘A cockney Duchess?’

“That is how I identify.”

‘Uhuh so what can I do for you your highness.’

“Well, not to be too cheeky bout it but you’re squattin in me toilet.”

‘Gross. Didn’t know rabbits had toilets.’

“Told you I’m the Duchess.”

‘Yeah…yeah…sorry.’ Leonard thought as he rose.

“Say do you have the lemon and lime?”

‘That’s exactly what I came her to lose.’

“O? And did ya?”

‘Nah. Cause now it’s time for me to be goin seeing as I’ve stumbled onto a royal outhouse.’

“Well, where did ya think ye were?”

‘Kentucky.’ Leonard mused wistfully.

With that the trucker awoke vomiting violently in the toilet of a Dutch Royal Shell.

“Fuck, I knew I shouldn’t of eaten that sandwich.”

“You alright lad?” An accented voice followed the sound of a gently opening door.

Leo whirled around to face a lot lizard with a Saxon jaw that could break icebergs.

“Oh, Christ… Don’t tell me you’re the duchess!”


Well…I have to rely on rather modest equipment…while on a tight scheduel…as such I may not be able to render another philosophy vlog. So in case I do the proper thing and fall asleep I leave you with this umm…gem.

If you’d like to help me improve my video productions and get less stories about transvestite rabbits then kindly toss a shilling in me hat guvner.

Support the Journal

Make a donation via PayPal to help zazz things up.

$1.00

Not Just Zazz…but Pizzazz

Too high class for regular Zazz? Help Pizzaz up TFJ!

$5.00

 

Amthlynam (Short Story)

Image result for dark tree arcade"


Notre Dame, Big Ben, the Sistene chapel. These are known marvels. But what of those that crumbled into dust?

Centuries of soil at times wild with trees at times green with pasture shroud their memory. Alternating patchworks of increase and decline are the lily’s placed beside their tomb.

And the minds of men?

Do they dwell where their fathers tread?

Does the electricity in that pound of flesh called brain produce the sublime spires of Amthlynam?

Or does dull gain drive both the laborer and the sage to be unalloyed merchants?

How long I’ve waited! How many cold cramped hours have I spent beneath Paviljoensgracht!

Minutes from where Spinoza’s neat black leather shoes tapped their familiar rhythms. Past the musty smell of weathered books lived old Harris.

This medelander was neither Dutch nor old.

He spoke rarely and in accents that did not give up the English name that was apparent only to those who asked. For the first name, Peter, could well be Dutch.

While he possessed the rough hands of a sailor he had none of their mannerisms.

Neither old nor young but altogether indeterminate in every way he’d have drawn much speculation. That is if he appeared long enough to arouse speculation in those few lonely souls that haunted the alehouse.

Those that spoke to him were soon put off by his terse answers. It was not pleasant to talk to the medelander who never grew drunk, smiled only as a begrudged gesture of goodwill, and seemed to be perpetually interested by something in the middle distance.

If any of the bustling shopkeeps, fishers, or millers had cared they could easily have learned all of his habits. Habits by which they could have set their watches. So regular was he in his comings and goings that those who had a financial interest in them would prepare the port, paper, or herring that he required before he arrived.

One would think that the merchants of that great city would talk and wonder. But they did not. Neither fraternity nor curiosity could dare to break the fog around Peter Harris. A London mist so reticent and reserved that one stepped round it as reverently as if it were a grave.

He was so close. He could feel it. Could sense it wafting through the earthen walls. Three flights of stair within the flooded soil were Peter’s quarters. There was his business.

Here where the smell was symphony. Here he’d sit and listen. For in its myriad and unending notes there was a subtle voice. A voice that took a special ear. The perception of it nearly broke him.

Approaching the chemist’s table that had seen so many fits and starts he let out a chuckle. It was so strange a sound to hear. For its prolonged absence from his lips made it as clumsy and unnatural as all his strivings.

He picked up a scalpel and approached the eastern wall. There he scraped the fungi onto a silver tray. Placing this curiosity beside the brown wrapping that his writing-table bore he unfolded the latter. A sphere rolled across the oak and came to rest against a leatherbound copy of Blanquerna.

Having sterilized the scalpel in alcohol he sliced into the skin of the sphere. The rich clean aroma of citrus juxtaposed oddly with his subterranean surroundings. He consumed the grapefruit as circumspectly as he lived.

He took the silver tray and placed it beside an Ottoman. Here he reclined and took a few short contemplative puffs of hash. The first trick lay in silencing the critic. Then he could converse with the God that littered his tray.

He ate the soft pulpy flesh of this God.

And in moments the effects of communion were felt.

For before him was the heather field and the Sycamore tree.

“Shoo Ozzy.” Peter chided the now invisible cat that nuzzled at his ankles.

He heard the soft paws land softly in some other world.

“Bout time ya got here.” Said the small grim man sitting on the lowest branch.

A bit miffed at the lack of fanfare for his accomplishment Peter bit his lip and shrugged.

“Ooo the poor darling. Whaddya suppose… should I give ya medal for a bit of lemon n lime. Ain’t the way round here.”

Peter nodded.

“Right. That’s better then. So, what do you seek?”

“Memory.”

“Well we got plenty o that here. But first ye have to tell me the name o her chapel.”

Peter paused making sure to recall the proper pronunciation.

Am-flyn-am.”

With a smirk, the small grim man and the heather field gave way to a vast arcade brooding in the moonlight. In the midst of which stood a grace so sublime, whose suggestions were so perfect, that weaker men would have instantly gone mad.

Peter approached the gate of Amthlynam and found it open. He marveled at the spires, the stained glass, and the expressions of the gargoyles.

As the heavy oaken door squealed open Ozzy hissed.

“Do be quiet Ozzy!” Peter again chided.

To his great surprise, the beast responded. “Omnis homo est non recordabar.”

Peter shook his head and marched through baroque enchantments till he reached the book upon the pulpit.

On its leather surface were the tarnished silver letters that spelled out the common English word: Memory.

Peter read, and read, and read. He read until he was so full that he awoke screaming in tongues that hadn’t shook the air for aeons.

Ozzy had bitten his finger. Rousing him from his gluttony. But not soon enough.

If before he was obscure he now became infamous. He was the madman who the best sanitoriums the Hague had to offer could not cure. Weeping constantly and speaking with authority of the futures and histories of people he had never met.

His days as a triune pity, fortune teller, and sideshow came to an abrupt end on a cool September evening. No one had ever been able to locate Harris’ family so Doctor De Vries was ecstatic at the presence of a small grim old man who claimed to be Peter’s uncle.

Some now consider De Vries to be mad or worse a murderer. The aristocracy did not like a return to unpredictable destinies anymore than they liked infallibly dire predictions.

So very few believed the physician when he claimed that Peter died when the small grim man entered the room and spoke a simple English phrase.

“You didn’t think yad actually enjoy bein’ a knowitall didja?”

Upon whose utterance the very same uncle collapsed into a soft pulpy mushroom-like rubbish.


This tale is dedicated to H.P. Lovecraft.* A man whose diligent pursuit of preserving wonder and sensitivity in the face of callous empiricism is more important now than ever. A pursuit I attempt to ape with varied results.

And also to Ozzy Osbourne. Because he’s a mad lad. And the world would suck without Sabbath. 

Please donate because I don’t fancy dying from eating from too many tins. Not all aspects of one’s heroes lives are savory darlings.

Support the Journal

Make a donation via PayPal to help zazz things up.

$1.00

Not Just Zazz…but Pizzazz

Too high class for regular Zazz? Help Pizzaz up TFJ!

$5.00

 

 

 

 

The Cottage – Chapter Thirty – (Short Story)

Image result for whiskey tumbler falling
Part One | Part Two |Part Three |  Part Four |Part Five |  Part Six |Part Seven |Part Eight | Part Nine | Part Ten | Part Eleven | Part Twelve | Part Thirteen | Part Fourteen | Part Fifteen | Part Sixteen |Part Seventeen | Part Eighteen |Part Nineteen | Part Twenty | Part Twenty One | Part Twenty Two | Part Twenty Three | Part Twenty Four | Part Twenty Five | Part Twenty Six |Part Twenty Seven |Part Twenty Eight | Part Twenty Nine

The cottage seemed even emptier than before. Luckadoo’s party had pressing matters across the pond. They did not tarry long.

It was annoying. Everything was always open ended. Just left there laying vague and cryptic.

It felt like trying to get a direct answer from a Sunday School class.

Jim pushed an empty tumbler across the wooden floor with his boot. Watching as geometry and gravity drew it along in a lazy semi-circle.

It was just so.

Drawn along by necessity.

Jim did not like the idea of fate. His heart sank as he meditated on the inevitable sound of glass on wood.

It was a thought that made the twilight even gloomier.

He stopped the arc.

Slowly but surely it dawned on him. Slowly but surely his mood brightened.

He wasn’t just so.

The arc had stopped. It had stopped not by some mechanical necessity but by something wispy and wild. It was a variable. A very peculiar one. One that had neither weight, shape, nor volume, but occupied all those dimensions on a whim. It was the ultimate unknown.

The thing, the x, was will, and it belonged to him. It empowered him to solve, to balance the equation.

Ok, so he had pep. But he didn’t know what to do with it.

The gloom returned.

Again the thought of the tumbler depressed him, how it was drawn along by whims as cryptic as his uncles ravings.

But it did roll…didn’t it…

That’s all it could do given the situation…but it did something…

‘Maybe that’s all I can do…just roll with it.’

And so he burst forth from the cabin, in the direction of the caves, to do something till something…somethinged…

Of course he didn’t get far.

‘I’m not a fucking tumbler.’

He plopped down into the tall grass by the border of the wood. The uneven prickly surface and cool air quickly reminding him of his limitations.

He’d have to wing it. But he needed wings.

As sense returned he trudged towards the cottage to read, gather a pack, and nap.


Call Me An Idiot Here

http://www.minds.com/Weirmellow

Or Here

mellow.mission.productions@gmail.com

Support This Here

http://www.subscribestar.com/TFJ

Or With PayPal

Support the Journal

Make a donation via PayPal to help zazz things up.

$1.00

Not Just Zazz…but Pizzazz

Too high class for regular Zazz? Help Pizzaz up TFJ!

$5.00

The Cottage – Chapter Twenty Nine – (Short Story)

Image result for synapses firing
Part One | Part Two |Part Three |  Part Four |Part Five |  Part Six |Part Seven |Part Eight | Part Nine | Part Ten | Part Eleven | Part Twelve | Part Thirteen | Part Fourteen | Part Fifteen | Part Sixteen |Part Seventeen | Part Eighteen |Part Nineteen | Part Twenty | Part Twenty One | Part Twenty Two | Part Twenty Three | Part Twenty Four | Part Twenty Five | Part Twenty Six |Part Twenty Seven |Part Twenty Eight

There was a sensation of whirling, of spinning headlong blindly through ether. It felt like eternities had passed between the clap and the first glimmers of some strange purplish light.

“Holy shit it’s laser Floyd!”  Jim exclaimed facetiously.

“Are you familiar with physics?” Germain inquired.

He could hear the question but see nothing besides darkness, and the strange hazy purple glow.

“Are you familiar with physics?” Germain repeated.

“Apparently not. Unless ya drugged me.”

“There’s no need to force the lock if you’ve got a key.”

“Maybe so…”

“Just so.”

“Uhuh, and uh what the hell door did we just step through here?”

“I guess I should get more specific. Are you familiar with circuits?”

“Sure, I’ve wired a house before.”

“There are countless electromagnetic impulses. That is the universe and its operation. It is one vast eternal brain folded densely to infinity. With time and patience, one can learn to prune this synaptic garden that blossoms in perfect holy Chaos.”

“If it’s so holy…than how come you’re prunin’ it? Isn’t that kinda cocky?”

“The root of chaos is in the seeking of order. Its worship is thus inevitable. Whether I call it holy or damned it will birth and be praised by every principality.”

“So God is chaos?”

“To the untrained God is such an absurdly vast chain of causality, such a solipsistic, self-referential thing; that had religion not risen to facilitate communion, to distill the essence of the unfathomable, only angels would approach understanding.”

“That’s a pretty big word salad you served up to such a simple question.”

“What you are seeing now, is how these mountains draw and transmit celestial light from distant stars. Their pulsing is sentient and wishes to add flesh to its nerves. Seeks this with such zeal that it will have any form. Because the El are divided, it manifests as troops of grey monstrosities chittering the discord that binds them to the ground bass of the errant heart of the fallen.”

“Gnarly.”

“I am talking about a current. They will it one way. It is our duty to will it aright. You, young fool, are merely a very specific transistor that has unfortunately become indispensable to rewiring the aeon.”

Jim wasn’t really sure what all that meant.

“You see, some Angels would prefer that only they would approach understanding.”

“You’re talkin’ bout some cosmic country club?”

The old man chuckled.

“And you want me to crash their Thursday night social?”

“Yes!”

“How?”

“Go to the caves.”

There was another clap. The world returned. Everyone was in the exact same spot, making the same exact motion, as when Jim had slipped into the dark following the first.

It seemed that the old man and he, had just had a private conversation in some secret room.

“What was that purple light?”

“Well, it’s usually more blue round here, there’s no name for it really…but I’ve always called it ‘transcendental electricity.’ We all have it. We are all particles in its waveforms. As individuals and as nations…But of course the El have a stronger current…so its dramatically visible in etheric space. And even in the earth…as I’ve said…it is blue…I believe you’ve seen it. And you will…you must see it again. Go to the caves.”

“Hell no. I’m not getting my city slicker ass stuck in some hillbilly crawlspace.”

“There is no danger for you. Your blood knows the way.”

Jim shook his head.

“Don’t you want to crash the party?”

This time he cocked his head and smirked at the prospect of some good Yuppie thwartin’ possibilities. But he did not relish the idea of dying in some pitch black hole no man was meant to spelunk. Much less a tenderfooted one like him.

The old man held his gaze for a spell and then turned to stare at the fire.

Jim, a few drinks past the limit of self consciousness shifted his attention to Elsa.


Call Me An Idiot Here

http://www.minds.com/Weirmellow

Or Here

mellow.mission.productions@gmail.com

Support This Here

http://www.subscribestar.com/TFJ

Or With PayPal

Support the Journal

Make a donation via PayPal to help zazz things up.

$1.00

Not Just Zazz…but Pizzazz

Too high class for regular Zazz? Help Pizzaz up TFJ!

$5.00


Image Credit – https://approximatefield.wordpress.com/2010/01/27/my-code-synapse-is-firing/

 

 

 

 

 

 

The Cottage – Part Twenty Eight – (Short Story)

Image result for sigil of saturn
Part One | Part Two |Part Three |  Part Four |Part Five |  Part Six |Part Seven |Part Eight | Part Nine | Part Ten | Part Eleven | Part Twelve | Part Thirteen | Part Fourteen | Part Fifteen | Part Sixteen |Part Seventeen | Part Eighteen |Part Nineteen | Part Twenty | Part Twenty One | Part Twenty Two | Part Twenty Three | Part Twenty Four | Part Twenty Five | Part Twenty Six | Part Twenty Seven

Jim was stuck again by the shift in atmosphere. With all these bodies luxuriating by the firelight it was indeed downright homey. The warmth was pleasant.

But it was also naseuting. Jim did not trust these fine feelings. He did not want comradarie with these soft strangers.

“I’ve heard you call these things the El more than once. What is that…?”

“It is an emanation of the Most High or rather an echo. Whose seal is Saturn.”

“I thought they were from Saggitarius.”

“The manifestation on this plane is mediated through the sixth planet from the sun.”

“Huh?”

“What do you suppose it means to be cast down?”

“Uh…”

“Which fate is grimmest for an angel?”

Jim rolled his eyes.

“To be clothed in limit. Girded in restricting loins of flesh. Mind you it is possible to be immeasurably powerful despite such division. They are clever and it was they that taught us to forge the rawness of the earth into sword and iron.”

“So gremlins…are aliens…who are angels….because….reasons?”

The old man chuckled hollowly.

It did make a certain sense. All these various takes on a single phenomenon. Strange little introductions in a history that only appeared in snippets to the attentive. But so what? That’s the thing that Jim didn’t undestand. That he never understood about all this religious sort of stuff. So what?

Fine people perished along with the wicked. And of what consequence is it that they dwelt in grand eternities?

Of what consequence is a principilaity of imps in a thing like eternity? A thing that nullifies. Time the great healer, the great eraser, stretched limitless across the canvas of forever…whatever its mechanism…so what?

“Just be mindful that they don’t entrace you. There is cause. I see their poison dancing in your eyes.”

Jim gulped. He was still indeed between worlds.

“Can’t knock me down.” He insisted.

“At this late hour, they are a part of us all.”

“I have no parts.”

Elsa giggled.

“You are as fragmented as a mosaic. This is the lot of man. To gahter himself tile by tile, till he beholds his place in the firmament, and his connexion to the Godhead.”

“Right on man.” Jim mocked.

“Listen boy, it is at great cost that I and those here assembled have gathered enough of ourselves to see you through.”

“Oh?”

“Yes. As they seperate the spirit from the flesh so must you seperate their flesh from their spirit. They must not be allowed to cross the threshold as corporeal till the appointed season.”

“I don’t get it.”

“You don’t have to. No one expects a rotten tapestery to herald truth. You must follow for each faithful step will be be rewarded by increased sight.”

With this the adept clapped his hands and the cottage went dark.


Call Me An Idiot Here

http://www.minds.com/Weirmellow

Or Here

mellow.mission.productions@gmail.com

Support This Here

http://www.subscribestar.com/TFJ

Or With PayPal

Support the Journal

Make a donation via PayPal to help zazz things up.

$1.00

Not Just Zazz…but Pizzazz

Too high class for regular Zazz? Help Pizzaz up TFJ!

$5.00

 

 

The Cottage – Part Twenty Seven – (Short Story)

Part One | Part Two |Part Three |  Part Four |Part Five |  Part Six |Part Seven |Part Eight | Part Nine | Part Ten | Part Eleven | Part Twelve | Part Thirteen | Part Fourteen | Part Fifteen | Part Sixteen |Part Seventeen | Part Eighteen |Part Nineteen | Part Twenty | Part Twenty One | Part Twenty Two | Part Twenty Three | Part Twenty Four | Part Twenty Five | Part Twenty Six

Jim could barely sit up. There had been gravy….with a side of gravy…dipped in venison and lard. He had to go outside with a mug of coffee to keep from falling asleep. The cool evening and the swaying trees were bracing. And each sip of the bold black liquid helped restore his verve.

Elsa and Germain were in the center of the meadow. The elder was gesturing heavenward with his arms in a slow methodical sort of way. Though he couldn’t hear them and they were blanketed in darkness Jim thought he saw Elsa nodding along.

His curiosity sufficiently peaked, he set off in their direction. The odd pair were further than he had guessed, and he was winded by the time he reached them. Neither  turned as the old man continued pointing and speaking in a low accented voice.

Elsa was indeed nodding along as she asked questions in what Jim guessed to be French. Now that he was close he followed the elder’s pointing up to the target.

A chill ran down his spine.

It was the very same cluster of stars he’d seen that night he got paralyzed on the granite. Though he didn’t know the name he’d remembered his boyhood visits to the cottage. Visits where Hant would point at this ‘the archer’ the ‘town hall of the galaxy.’

Jim was frightfully curious now. Both as to why everybody was so fixated with this southern cluster and as to how exactly Elsa had gotten that wheelchair so far over all this  thick tall grass.

“Stargazing?” He inquired.

She turned round lightly and blew him a kiss. “Yes, izn’t eet wanderful!”

“Meh, I guess,” Jim responded. “But, if I’m being completely honest I’ve kinda had it with stars out here. There’s too many and they seem too bright, too close. It’s like being stuck up heaven’s asshole.”

Elsa laughed good-naturedly.

German could not turn his wheelchair and opted to instead mutter something in French.

“I thought you were a kraut broad?”

“Dee French border iz not far frohm Hesse.”

“Don’t you Eurodorks know that the only language worth talkin’ is God’s own English.”

Elsa stuck out her tongue.

“I can speak the language of dogs perfectly.” The oldster retorted in cut-glass poshness. “I’d simply prefer not to contort such a noble instrument as the human tongue into such barbaric positions.”

“Another feisty Boomer?” Jim rolled his eyes.

“No, you arrogant little Anglo fool, I may well have sired your grandfather.”

“…uh…so we’re related?”

Elsa laughed. “Nein, at least I don’t dink so…” she said turning Germain’s chair to face them. “The doktor has been leeving very long and is very wize. You must heer heem. He will helf you.”

“Ok, so what’s up with these stars Doc? Hant was crazy about ’em.”

Germain nodded. “That is Saggitarius.”

“Afraid I don’t take much stock in that astrology shit.”

“This is astronomy you mealy-brained Paddy. Astronomy that will be your undoing unless you learn it.”

“Rather be a Mick than a Frog.”

Elsa shook her head.

“I’m about to let you on something that won’t be revealed for several decades. I have every right to tease you.”

“Fine by me, so long as I get to tease back.”

The elder ignored this repartee.

“Saggitarius is located near the center of our galaxy. Near the border of Saggitarius and Scorpius there is a black hole.”

“Ok. That’s pretty sci-fi.”

“The cliche is true. Fact is stranger than fiction. This currently theoretical construct is the highway by which your little friends travel. Or rather the mechanism…”

“Neat, so how does all this work and uh…more importantly what the fuck are they…?”

“That is a very long story and I am very cold. So we’ll have to continue this indoors.”

Elsa got behind the wheelchair-bound elder and began to push him effortlessly over the uneven ground.

Jim grabbed the back of the chair. “Hold on. How the hell…”

“Elsa get this baboon off my damned throne.”

He was completely disarmed by the sensation of soft fingers tickling his kneck and warm whispers caressing his ears. “Heel tell you soon…just letuz got noaw.”

“I’ll tell him now!” The old man exploded. “You have to dumb things down for his lot so it won’t take long. It’s coated in a polymer…o wait that’s a bit too difficult…I’m sorry….it’s magic WD-40!”

“See, that’s all I wanted.” Jim responded.

“Yes, now that this bog breathing alleycats base curiosity is sated CAN WE PLEASE GO INSIDE..”


Call Me An Idiot Here

http://www.minds.com/Weirmellow

Or Here

mellow.mission.productions@gmail.com

Support This Here

http://www.subscribestar.com/TFJ

Or With PayPal

Support the Journal

Make a donation via PayPal to help zazz things up.

$1.00

Not Just Zazz…but Pizzazz

Too high class for regular Zazz? Help Pizzaz up TFJ!

$5.00

The Cottage – Part Twenty Six – (Short Story)

Image result for norman invasion
Part One | Part Two |Part Three |  Part Four |Part Five |  Part Six |Part Seven |Part Eight | Part Nine | Part Ten | Part Eleven | Part Twelve | Part Thirteen | Part Fourteen | Part Fifteen | Part Sixteen |Part Seventeen | Part Eighteen |Part Nineteen | Part Twenty | Part Twenty One | Part Twenty Two | Part Twenty Three | Part Twenty Four | Part Twenty Five

The fire was already blazing. Its warmth and the presence of people gave the austere cottage a homey feel. Jim was surprised by the party that had gathered. There were four guests. Which to his accustomed isolation qualified as a crowd.

Elsa was stoking the flame in front of the wheelchair bound cipher he’d glimpsed the other evening. The elder was as still and silent as before. Jim was annoyed by the familiarity with which Luckadoo folded his unwieldy frame into a recliner as Lizzy disappeared into the kitchen.

“So, should I get used to surprise parties?” He queried ruefully.

“You’re gonna start to miss us real soon.” Jonas replied.

“I’ve never been much of a social butterfly…”

“Good news is that you can go back to being an introvert. Since, we’re going to be leaving the valley in a matter of days. The bad news is you’re going to continue to have company.”

“As long as they knock…I’m not bothered.”

Jonas gave a low chuckle.

“I think you already know that your new friends aren’t much accustomed to such niceties.”

Jim was tempted to make a joke at Lizzy’s expense but he was cut off by the unpleasant recollection of those eyes.

There was a brief moment of uneasy silence. It felt like Jonas was letting the fear set in.

“Well, if you don’t mind, I’m gonna get myself a drink.”

Luckadoo spread his arms in an expansive motion. It was annoying. Jim got the impression that he was being invited to his own home. He crossed the floor to the mantel with as masterful an air as he could muster and poured a tumbler full of Johnny Walker Red.

Plopping on the couch he shot his legs up on the coffee table. “So, ya got somethin’ to tell me?”

Jonas nodded.

“Well…?”

“I’m almost certain you’re hungry.”

It was true. Jim was hungry. It kept him from exploding in rage at the commandeering of his kitchen.

“Don’t worry,” Luckadoo grinned wryly. “Lizzy’s portions are heartier than Charlotte’s.”

“Well, good.” Was the pithy reply as Jim downed the whiskey and poured himself a second in a single motion.

In his efforts to establish dominance he hadn’t noticed that Elsa and the old man had taken their leave.

“So, who’s the old timer?”

Jonas exhaled smoke and allowed for a moment of silence.

“He’s an uncle of mine. Though I’m not sure he’s actually blood. His name is Germain and he is a Norman.”

“Ok…”

“I think that you’re going to be very interested in what he has to say.”

“He doesn’t seem to have very much to say at all.”

Jonas laughed. “As far as I understood that’s a habit he’s had since youth. He’s always been taciturn. It’s part of the reason you’re going to find his speech especially useful. Germain focuses most of his energies on inner work and thus is quite the adept at dealing with the El.”

“Now when you say the El…you mean those goblin things?”

“Yes…after a manner…that is to say…they are a manifestation of the El.”

“Uh…huh…” Jim’s eyes glazed over.

Jonas decided not to dignify that particular bit of snark with a response.

“So…since everybody and their uncle seems to know so much more about all this weird ass voodoo bullshit how come it’s all my fuckin’ responsibility.”

“You are bound by blood.”

“Well, that’s not very fucking fair is it. Had no part in any of these shenanigans.”

“If you understood it…which I’m hoping you very shortly will…you’d realize that it was indeed fair. You didn’t spring out of a vacuum Jimmy boy, none of this did.” The giant said outsretching his arms again to indicate the world.

“Ok…”

But, Jim didn’t have time for a witty repartee as Lizzy’s piercing voice penetrated every wall of the cottage. “Dinners reddy…kom n git it!”


Image Source –  http://www.normanconquest1066.org


Call Me An Idiot Here

http://www.minds.com/Weirmellow

Or Here

mellow.mission.productions@gmail.com

Support This Here

http://www.subscribestar.com/TFJ

Or With PayPal

Support the Journal

Make a donation via PayPal to help zazz things up.

$1.00

Not Just Zazz…but Pizzazz

Too high class for regular Zazz? Help Pizzaz up TFJ!

$5.00

 

 

The Cottage – Part Twenty Five – (Short Story)

Image result for cigar in the dark
Part One | Part Two |Part Three |  Part Four |Part Five |  Part Six |Part Seven |Part Eight | Part Nine | Part Ten | Part Eleven | Part Twelve | Part Thirteen | Part Fourteen | Part Fifteen | Part Sixteen |Part Seventeen | Part Eighteen |Part Nineteen | Part Twenty | Part Twenty One | Part Twenty Two | Part Twenty Three | Part Twenty Four

It took awhile for Jim to regain his senses. The dusk had settled. There was nothing left to do but head for shelter. The thought that terrified him most was that anything was possible.

He kept feeling himself pulled along by strange tides. All those insane suggestions he’d just drunk from a firehose, were threatening to hypnotize him, to leave him tethered gawking and exposed in the strange wilderness.

It was odd how quickly the pleasure of the mountains turned to terror. The fear that Jim felt was not corporeal. Bodily harm was the least of his troubles.

The thing that worried him was that there was no safety. There were no absolutes. The only reality was flux, self-referential, unoriginate, and eternal. He bit his lip.

This steadied him somewhat. Awareness shifted from yawning abysses to the delightfully familiar cicada song. The approaching evening was cool. The change in temperature helped orient him to reality and he trudged homeward.

Something seemed amiss upon approach. Caution seeped into his limbs as the anomaly was slowly drawn from his subconscious.

The door was slightly ajar. All traces of wonder vanished in an instant as the sobering caution of self-preservation took hold. Jim’s footfalls became stealthy as his ears grew keen.

While memory proved foggy the probability that he’d left the cottage permeable was low. The reptile brain had complete mastery now, and he treated the situation like one of his burglaries. Flanking the wall, he soon found his suspicion well founded.

Audible but unintelligible, faint traces of conversation reached his ears. There was also an odor. A familiar odor. The odor of a peculiar cigar.

Broad footfalls resounded as the door swung inward and a giant with a hot cherry emerged.

“For Gods sake, boy, would you get inside. You just walked across several thousand yards of open meadow. And now you think you’re Seal Team Ten.”

The voice was as unmistakable as the commanding height from which it came.

The sardonic profile of Jonas Luckadoo was revealed by the waxing glow of a cigar puff. Jim was too astonished to speak.

But not for long.

Annoyance found his tongue for him. “How the hell did ya get in my house?”

“Is that any way to greet a friend?”

“Friends don’t usually break into friend’s houses.”

Jim shook his head and grimaced his displeasure with the banter.

Just as he was about to speak another body, comically small in contrast to that of Luckadoo, energetically crossed the threshold.

“If it isn’t the fool.” Came another unmistakable voice.

Lizzy seemed to have made a full recovery. He could feel the strange wizened energy that radiated from the crane-necked crone even at a distance.

“To what do I owe this displeasure?” Jim inquired as he realized how Luckadoo had gained access to the cottage.

“We thought you could use some company.”

“Couldn’t you wait on the porch like normal people?”

“This is my house.” Lizzy answered defiantly.

“Then how come I live here?”

“Cause you got the blood. But I’m tellin’ ya, I got the deed.”

“Well, there does seem to be a reason I’m here. So as far as I see it I live here. And while I live here I’d appreciate it if you didn’t just traipse through my living room.”

“Don’t you have questions?”

“Yeah…I already asked them.”

“So, you want to know why we’re here?”

Jim nodded.

“After all that you’ve seen, the question you have to ask is why your friends popped round? You’re an odd sort aren’t you?”

Jim nodded again.

“Well, I just don kir whether you’re curious or not. Fools gotta be forcefed at times.” Lizzy said as she shot down the stairs and dragged Jim inside by the ear.


Header Image Source – https://www.videoblocks.com/video/man-in-a-dark-room-smoking-a-cigar-rk7-j4bimrsdie0


Call Me An Idiot Here

http://www.minds.com/Weirmellow

Or Here

mellow.mission.productions@gmail.com

Support This Here

http://www.subscribestar.com/TFJ

Or With PayPal

Support the Journal

Make a donation via PayPal to help zazz things up.

$1.00

Not Just Zazz…but Pizzazz

Too high class for regular Zazz? Help Pizzaz up TFJ!

$5.00